Hairy University Dominos: The Wisdom Bun and the Wisdom Beard

It is november, and the weather is currently shittier that the service on the district line...... ok, people who are not familiar with the service on the London Underground probably won't get that reference, but either way it gets dark at 4 o clock now and the sky is black and pelting it down.

In my primary school, we use to play this game where depending on the sorts of rain we would associate them with one of Gods moods or actions. For example, if its raining heavily for about 15 minutes or so, God was washing his hands. So in the context of the old primary school game, I'd say that got has lost all control of his bladder for the past week or two and should probably go see a specialist or invest in some adult nappies.

I suppose the weather being the shits is actually a good thing this time of year, as it means that I can't get distracted by sunshine forcing you to procrastinate. It's interesting to see how peoples aperance  changes over the course of the term. In the beginning you can see that people are actually trying to look nice, hair is done all nicely, most of them have and a new hair cut or colour, the boys are clean shaven, and peoples outfits tend to be fairly well thought out this usually lasts for a long time and then the Wisdom Bun makes its evil apperance.

The Wisdom Bun, is a specimin that forms on the top of female university students. Wisdom Buns are mounted on the top of the subjects head which is basically, a messy bun which comes from students having little to no time to do their hair due to the amounts of school work slowly escalating throughout the course of the term. As soon as the first Wisdom Bun appears on the head of a poor student marks in the first Wisdom Bun that triggers a  domino affect and it is just a matter of time before the remainder is doomed to be a victim on the Wisdom Bun. By the end of the semester, approximately 7/8 of the female university population will have a Wisdom Bun mounted on their head, and nestled in their scruffy clothes. I saw my first Wisdom Bun appear in about the forth week of school this year, but i guess that is expected to happen when you are taking a forth year history class.

I managed to hold out till week eight of the semester before my first Wisdom Bun mounted itself on my head. Then it dissappeared again until this past week and now its back and will remain until the 5th of December. The unfortunate thing about Wisdom Buns is, they rarely,  provide any extra wisdom which is much appreciated by the female student during times of academic purgatory. Basically the wisdom bun is a pseudonym for, "I look like Shit and I don't care nor do I have time bun, or do I give a flying f&#k, I just want sleep, wine and a bubble bath bun". It's probably for the best that the Wisdom Bun operates under that aylias, for names sake at least.

Although male university students don't opt for the wisdom bun (ok well the ones that arn't dirty hippies) men can typically be seen sprouting Wisdom Beards, or Scholarly Scruff as some men arn't quite able to sprout Wisdom Beards . Just like the Wisdom Bun, the Wisdom Beard slowly creeps up on the university male through out the course of the semester. As soon as one man decides to opt for a Wisdom Beard or scholarly scruff due to lack of time or simply not caring, or onset of exams they realize that, many of the great scholars have had quite epic beards. So, by sprouting a beard they will have the wisdom of Charles Darwin, and their cranial capactiy will expand greatly, allowing them do dominate over assignments and exams. I am not a man so I cannot say if they do provide any extra wisdom or if they just provide extra warmth for the winter.

Some times the Wisdom beards go on hold for the the month of november ,during the joyus month of "movember" in which 90% of the good looking men, and university men in general decided they would like a sex embargo to be issued from their significant other. Perhaps the single ones instead want to see what they would like if they were to become a famous dicatator ( name 1 dictator that has not had a distinctive moustache) by growing something that looks like a slug met big foot on their lip.

Wisdom Buns, Wisdom Beards, and Scholarly Scruff, slowly start to decline as of the last day of classes. As more and more students become increasingly liberated from the academic deamons  of the underworld, in which bibliographies, lab exams and chicago style essay formats reign supreme. The reverse domino affect of the Wisdom Buns, Wisdom Beards and Scholarly Scruff can be seen. Females hair returns to a multiple array of perfectly designed hairstyles, targeted to highlight their features, razors are reunited with the hands, neck and face of the university males.

I suppose a term at university is just a bunch of domino's or rounds of dominos..... well hairdos and facial hairdos anyway. They rise they fall the come back for more and will only dissapear once the student walks across the stage to get their $20,000 piece of paper. Unfortunately for me, thats still about 2.5 years away so it looks like I still have several rounds of Wisdom Bun dominos to experience...... better stock up on the hair ties in that case.